Toe Puppets. What's next, finger socks?

Oh, come on! Toe puppets? Everybody knows that we don't need animal toe puppets because they are already piggys. What were they thinking?

Kids shoot their mouths off with PEZ gun

This is the patent of the famous PEZ candy shooter. I would love to go back in time and be a fly on the wall of the marketing genius’s who thought this one up. I’m sure it went something like this:
“How about this? We make a toy gun that kids fill with PEZ candy. Now here’s the best part… when they want a piece of candy they put the barrel of the gun into their mouths and pull the trigger! Brilliant!”

Doggy umbrella/leash patent

Sure, your dogs not going to get wet, but will it get better reception?

Hey chick, are those Foster Grants you're wearing?

A chicken with safety glasses? Why not? I suppose this finally settles that conundrum about which would win in a fight to the death; a chicken or a beta fish? Of course, if the fight is in water… or in space…

Pick a mouse, any mouse.

That’s right, this is a patent for that famous street gambling game; “Three Cat Mousy”. Countless feline families have been destroyed by this seaming harmless activity. In the words of Pete Rose: “Hey Pussy, wanna bet?”

Now where did I leave that calf? Oh, here it is!

Why is it that your cows are always in the last place you look? This patent was designed to eliminate that annoying problem of misplaced livestock. It’s about time!

Human cup holder

I think I understand what the inventor was going for here, but I can't help but think that the version with the cup in Fig 2 is just plain cruel. It looks like one of those wooden toys where you have a wooden handle with a turned wooden cup one end, and a wooden ball on the end of a string that you try to catch in cup. Maybe I’m making too much of this one.

Combo cat feeder/bird trap

I wonder what inspired this invention. Did the inventor have a hungry cat or an abundance of birds? Either way I think this is genius and sick at the same time. I think it would be awesome if someone would invent combination a ice-cream sandwich trap/me feeder. Mmmmmmm.

New eBay store for corn cob pipes

Not exactly fitting with the "What were they thinking" theme, but still worth a mention. This site features the famous Missouri Meerschaum Corn Cob Pipes. Check it out.

New Gallery-size US Patent Art Prints, just in time for Christmas! (Click to visit site)

Over the past two years we've had many requests for Patent Art Prints that are larger than our standard 8 1/2" X 11", and up until now we haven't been able to satisfy the request... until now! We've just launched what we call "Gallery Size" patent art prints on our ebay store and we invite you to check them out. Every one of our 4000+ patent prints are available in four sizes, so if you know of someone who is passionate about something like PEZ, Woodworking, Firearms, Sports or anything funny or weird like the patents we've shown in this blog, you might want to check these out.

With vibrating body piercings, who needs TV?

Now here's a guy that knows how to have a good time. One problem though. Where do you put the batteries? Oh! Never mind!

Ladies, if magician Penn Jillette invites you to his hot tub, you're in for a surprise!

Penn Jillette of the famous magic duo Penn and Teller was granted this patent for a Female Stimulation feature for a hot tub. This reminds us of a quote from Tim Allen to his wife when he installed a hot tub in his bathroom on Home Improvement. "This baby has three speeds; Low, Medium, and Who Needs a Man." What was Penn thinking?

Device For Males For The Prevention Of 'Self-Abuse'

This patent from 1904 covered an electrified device that was for the “prevention of 'self-abuse' among males. We're not sure if it worked for the males but we believe it caught on among some of the females.

Smokers Hat Patent

As a cigar and pipe smoker from the tobacco center of the USA, North Carolina, it never fails to surprise me when I visit California or NYC and experience the venomous anti-smoking attitude. Perhaps if this patented device was ever put into production smokers like me could be free to puff away without fear of public ridicule. Yeah, right.

Be the ball! Be the ball! Be the… I’m dizzy.

If you think this looks like the perfect golf club for a head-banger, you’d be wrong. The club would swing the wrong way and might cause sever damage to the… um… balls.

Who doesn't need more time? How about a 25 hour clock?

Obviously the inventor of this clock was trying to squeeze an additional hour into their day, but I’m not sure they quite grasp the concept of time. Personally I would have made a 23 hour clock, that way the hour’s left would be longer. See Einstein, it’s simple.

Now here's a pet that really sucks!

This patent is for a dog shaped vacuum cleaner. We’re not quite sure of the breed but we are sure that the pet stores would really clean-up with, oh, never mind.

Centrifugal Force Birth Accelerator (click for details)

I don’t know if Angelina Jolie or Katie Holmes used the Centrifugal Force Birth Accelerator shown in this patent but if they did they certainly would not have been silent! Wheee!

Monkey Riding Greyhound (click for details)

Everyone knows that greyhounds live having a monkey on their backs as much as the next guy, they just don’t get the chance very often any more. This patent covered a saddle for just this activity.

NutCracker, Man's Worst Nightmare (click for details)

This patent makes us wonder what the inventor would do with a melon-baller!

1907 Do It Yourself Nose Job (click for details)

Michael Jackson obviously wasn’t the first person to want to change their image, but in this 1907 patent the inventor shows a practical alternative to surgery. Never mind that you had serious bed-head and creases from the straps on your face following a night with this torture device on your face, your nose looked marvelous!

Turns any truck into a "Dump Truck" (click for details)

What do you give the man who has everything? How about a device that converts the hitch on the back of his pick-up truck to a Port-o-John, of course! This is a real patent. Seriously, we are not making this stuff up. Does this make it a "Dump Truck" or a "Bumper Dumper"?

1908 Male Chastity Belt, aka "Keep it in your pants" (click for details)

The original title of this US Patent is “Sexual Armor”, and boy did they mean it!

Here’s a quote from the patent text:

“It is a deplorable but well known fact that one of the most common causes of insanity, imbecility and feeble mindedness, especially in youth, is due to masturbation or self abuse. This is about equally true of both sexes.”

This thing looks like something from the movie "Paper Clips Gone Wild!" All I can say is OUCH!

The Combover is patented? You bet your bald head it is! (click for details)

I have to admit, when I first heard that the comb-over was patented I thought it must be an urban legend, like the hook-man and the parked lovers, or like a funny Marilu Henner show. But low and behold here it is! Granted in 1977 this “invention” is credited to a father and son from Orlando Florida who obviously weren‘t aware of the fabulous GLH Can-O-Hair from Ron Popeil. Unfortunately for the inventors the patent has now expired, so all you wanna-be Donald Trumps out there can combover to your hearts content without fear of infringement. Isn’t the Public Domain a wonderful thing?

Leaf Raking Pants (click for details)

Some days this blog just about writes itself. Take the fine pair of pants on display at right, for example.

This is a picture from a patent for "leaf gathering pants".

Just let this image soak in for a moment: It’s Fall. The yard is full of colorful leaves and raking is going to take forever. What are you going to do about it? That’s right, you’re going to don your fancy new “Rake Pants” and you’re going to shuffle around the yard like Dustin Hoffman in Rainman.

Kids, take my advice: "Friends don’t let friends wear Rake Pants".
Now my Mother-in-law…

Hey Kid, is that a hamster in your pocket... (click for details)

Now here's a nice patent. There are several convenient things about a jacket that contains a living hamster...
1.) You always have your "little friend" with you, no matter where you go.
2.) Everyone knows chicks dig cute little animals.
3.) If you ever get stuck on an elevator for several days you know you won't starve to death, because everybody knows hamster feed is quite filling.
4.) You can fill it with H2O and carry your SeaMonkeys with you!

Wanna hear about something frustrating? (click for details)

eBay yanked a couple patent ads because they contained the trademarked name "Shopsmith". If you don't know about this tool it's sort of a food processor for woodworking. It's a table saw, it's a lathe, it's a drill press, etc. The original "Shopsmith" tool was invented in the early 1940's by a German immigrant who wanted to invent something that would sell. (Not a bad idea.) He founded the company Magna Engineering and they soon put into production the first of many "Shopsmith" tools, the 5-in-1 10ER. The name "Shopsmith" comes from a dinner party that the owner threw where the cost of admittance was a name for his new product. Because it did so many things the runner-up name was the chauvinistic "Mix-Mister", but in the end the winner was "Shopsmith".
Let me digress a moment...

A lot of folks don't know that the JEEP vehicle was made by several companies, including: Ford, Willys, AMC, Chrysler and now Daimler-Chrysler. Why do I mention this? Because just like the JEEP name the "Shopsmith" name has passed-on from one tool manufacturer to another until it finally came to rest where it has been since 1972, in Dayton Ohio. Before '72 the name "Shopsmith" always defined a line of tools made by the parent company, but in '72 Mr. John Folkerth picked the name "Shopsmith" as the name for his new company, Shopsmith Inc. This is where our problems begin.

I guess a lot of folks have been selling products that were never made by Shopsmith Inc, Magna Engineering Corp., Magna America Corp. or YUBA and have been using the name "Shopsmith" in their ads. Obviously this is unethical, and Shopsmith Inc has every right, and ebay has the responsibility to have these items either removed or edited.

That brings this post back to us. The patents we had posted as "Shopsmith Bandsaw" for example, where in fact patented by Magna engineering and sold under the name "Shopsmith". This is a fact, as can be seen in the ad above. At the request of Shopsmith Inc our ads were pulled by ebay because we were not authorized to use the name "Shopsmith", and our requests for such permission were not granted because of what the President implied was a slippery slope. Without a doubt selling a Chinese dado blade purchased at Odd Lots as a "Shopsmith" product would be a gross violation, but selling a US Patent Office print for a tool that was sold under the name "Shopsmith", and which is to this day sold by a company called "Shopsmith Inc"... I don't get it.

So, if you are interested in selling or purchasing Shopsmith product on ebay I suggest you use the term " Shop Smith", as this is not a trademark owned by Shopsmith Inc.

Coney Island Amusement Park Patents (click for details)

Here's a pic of the parachute drop at Coney Island in NY. The patent for this ride is one of dozens of amusement ride patents that we have been searching for in the past few weeks. Another interesting ride is the Wonder Wheel (Ferris Wheel). This ride is a combination Ferris Wheel/Roller Coaster that was patented in the early 1920's and is still in use today. Unfortunately the parachute drop is just a skeleton, but it stands as a monument of a bygone era. (I've never used that term before. My dad would be proud, but I now just feel old.) Another interesting patent from Coney Island is the Cyclone Roller Coaster. This was built in 1926 as part of Palisades Park. Though it isn't all that tall, or long, or fast, it is still one of the coolest coaster I have ever ridden.

The Internet Pinball Machine Database

The Internet Pinball Machine Database
Into Pinball? This site offers a nerds-eye view of pinball machines through the years.

Printable Thread Gauges and Other Tools for Identifying Nuts, Bolts, and Screws - Bolt Depot

Printable Thread Gauges and Other Tools for Identifying Nuts, Bolts, and Screws - Bolt Depot

Here's a company that sells tools for measuring fasteners. There are several printable charts that are available for free. Check it out.

Welcome to

Welcome to
Here's a great sight for anyone interested in woodworking and woodworking tools. Check them out!


Now this is something you don't see everyday. This is a single wheel motorcycle called a monocycle. We have a punch of these patents on our website

Patent Place USA PEZ Gun Candy Gun / Shooter Dispenser 1968 Patent Art Print

Patent Place USA PEZ Gun Candy Gun / Shooter Dispenser 1968 Patent Art Print: " PEZ Gun Candy Gun / Shooter Dispenser 1968 Patent Art Print
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eBay View About Me for aristocob

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Patents 101 - The Basics Of Patent Applications

Patents 101 - The Basics Of Patent Applications: "Patents 101 - The Basics Of Patent Applications
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A patent is an official document given by a national
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amount of time. Once the patent is granted, no one else has
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In the United States, the U.S. Patent and Trademark Office
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Not just anything can be patented. In fact, obtaining a
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Plant patents, which protect non-pollinating plants,
utility patents that protect regular, new inventions, and
design patents, which protect the look or creativity of a
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Patents give an inventor or business corporation the legal
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Patent Place USA Shopsmith (Magna) Mark V (5) Fence Patent Art Print

Patent Place USA Shopsmith (Magna) Mark V (5) Fence Patent Art Print: " Shopsmith (Magna) Mark V (5) Fence Patent Art Print
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High Point Classifieds - PATENT PLACE USA

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